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Acting as a Social Crutch and Trying to Fail More

I found myself pathetically paralyzed with anxiety this evening. I wanted to attend a comedy show where my friend was debuting but the show was not well marked at the bar. I asked a waitress how to get to the comedy show and she mentioned a side door. That side door was closed and locked. I circled the building twice before texting my friend but after ten minutes with no reply, I left. He called me finally and told me how to get to the show. I returned but once I got to the front door of the bar again, I could not bring myself to go in, walk to the back, and open a door which I couldn't identify from the outside peering through the windows. I again left.  I feel stupid for not going in. I feel like I let down my friend for not supporting him at his debut show. I don't fully understand why it was so scary to proceed, I guess because I was told, by staff, how to get the show and now I was going to circumvent what I was told. I'm perhaps too afraid of being in the wrong, an ex

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