Am I Fool?

It takes a certain amount of delusion to think you're going to make it in the film industry; that's how you survive. It's how you get up and make long drives to auditions for films that won't and can't be paying you. In an unspoken sense, every film or project you do without getting paid, you're somewhat investing in that film. Directly, you're investing your gas money and time. Indirectly, there's an expectation of greater gain from this project later down the road. But this may never happen.

But you can't think like that. If you don't think that this next project could be your next something that will lead you to something, then you wouldn't do anything and just like the old saying, you can't succeed if you don't try.

But also you can't be completely blind to reality. It's one of those things where, you can 'play around' [work for no money] all you want; until you don't have a roof over your head. Reality is real and it's harsh, it doesn't care about your dreams and will, quite often, run contrary to them.

I look at filmmakers that I aspire to be but it seems most are either well and privately educated or it's in their last name. Yes, people can still rise up, lift themselves by their bootstraps but this feels like a different time; not only for film but over all industries. There's too many of us for us all to follow our dreams and be happy.

The cost is thousands to go to just any old public college, all in the hopes of making money someday but making none right now. I left college and opted for practical film and acting experience; opted to put my face out their as early as possible as easy going and a hard worker.

Soon the Masters will cry their degrees are worthless, just as the Associates and the Bachelors before them; where will we be then? Who will survive then? And what will be next after that? Useless Doctorates?

In a sense, I've rambled and said nothing here, and yet, if you do understand, it's probably nothing you haven't already thought before.

Good luck to us all.